The Mastery Of Love – Don Miguel Ruiz
Genre: Non-fiction, Spiritual, Self-Help
Pages: 207
Release Date: January 1999
Rating: ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️/5

The Mastery Of Love by Don Miguel Ruiz, the author of The Four Agreements, is a ‘wisdom book’ that illuminates the fear-based beliefs and assumptions that undermine love and lead to suffering and drama in our relationships. Using insightful stories to bring his message to life, Ruiz shows us how to heal our emotional wounds, recover the freedom and joy that are our birthright, and store the spirit of playfulness that is vital to loving relationships.

I enjoyed this book. It was a quick and easy read that offered some very insightful advice regarding self love. One of the main topics that are discussed throughout the book is the importance of self love. Ruiz talks about love and creating meaningful relationships, not just a relationship/love between two people but the relationship you have with yourself. I like how Ruiz explains that we shouldn’t seek love, happiness, validation etc from our partners, our friends, our family or anybody we have a relationship with. When we rely on these things coming from an outside source we will never feel satisfied. We will always feel like it’s not enough. We have to find it from within and when we do that, we are able to build not only a better relationship with ourselves, but also better relationships with people because we already have what we want in abundance and we don’t have the expectation of anyone else having to give it to us.

‘If you take your happiness and put it in someone’s hands, sooner or later, she is going to break it. If you give your happiness to someone else, she can always take it away. Then if happiness can only come from inside of you and is the result of your love, you are responsible for your happiness. We can never make anyone responsible for our own happiness.’ (pg.53)

The other topic that was consistent throughout this book was the idea that we have the power to create what we want. It talks about an interesting concept of how our mind and our body are separate from each other and have different needs, but the mind confuses the needs of the body with its own to create a sense of identity, but when we become self aware, we are able to create what we really want. I found this idea very interesting to read about and it really made me stop and think for a moment about how the body and mind are separate from one another.

‘You take away what is not you, until in the end the only thing that remains is what you really are. It’s a long process of the mind finding its own identity.
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
You find out that you are not what you believe you are, because you never chose your beliefs. These beliefs were there when you were born…You start to notice that you are not the mind. If you go deeper, you start noticing that you are not the soul either. Then what you find out is so incredible. You find out that what you are is a force – a force that makes it possible for your body to live, a force that makes it possible for your whole mind to dream.’ (pg.129-130)

This book is probably one of my new favourite self-help books I’ve read. After reading The Four Agreements I really wanted to read more of Don Miguel Ruiz’s work, so I picked up this one and I’m so glad I read it. I found this book insightful and easy to read and I liked that it included old tales/stories to give examples of the author’s ideas.

The biggest take away from this book for me is that we have the power within us to create and rule our own lives. I highly recommend that everyone give this a read.

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